The Lost Art of Listening!
"You are hearing but you are not listening!" Well, that's what exactly happen to us most of the time, hearing but not LISTENING.
James & Jamie were attending a church service one Sunday.'Jamie, wasn't it a great sermon?' 'Sure it was!' Jamie said, ' but what did the preacher said?'
If you aspire to be a great public speaker, you must first learn how to be a great listener. It's interesting to note that almost all successful top-flight executives, CEOs, politicians have great listening skills, whereupon they will pay close attention whenever somebody speaks. Though you might not agree to everything a person says, in fact you don't have to, but it pays in the long run knowingly how much information you could obtain by just listening alone.
'Mama I know you love me so much and I just want to tell you, I love you, too.' 'Of course I do love you, dear! Why do you say that' 'Because everytime I speak, no matter how busy you are, you will always look at me in the eyes and pay close attention to everything I say.'
The story above illustrates so clearly, the power of listening have upon us, so the next time when somebody speaks, be sure to listen.
But does that mean I have to seriously listen whenever someone speaks? Glad you asked! Well, that depends!, listening is like reading a book, do you pay equal attention to reading a book of comics than studying for your World History? Of course not. One is meant for pleasure, and the other involves studying and thinking. Similarly the art of listening can be divided into 4 categories:
Appreciative Listening: Listening for pleasure in general; music, comedy.
Comprehensive Listening: Listening for information; news.
Emphatic Listening: Providing emotional support; in time of death and funeral.
Critical Listening: Constantly engage in self-talk and evaluation by judging what the speaker has to say based on your experience, knowledge, personalities and the like.
The best way to cultivate the habit of critical listening is by 'note-taking', as it keeps you engaged with the speech by providing you with a mechanism to capture any thoughts that comes to your mind. You may definitely forget whatever you hear, but by writing your thoughts down, it will stay with you. So the next time, wether you are attnding a lecture, or a church service or a talk given by someon, bring along a journal and you'll be amazed how much you have learnt over the years. You don't have to copy exactly everthing the speaker says, you are not there to duplicate his notes, but do write down anything you feel and perceive to be of important based on, as said beofre, your experience, knowledge and personalities... Put a star or an asterisk sign to indicate the level of importance. Last but not least, review it, as you might not be able to understand fully or digest everything the speaker says at that moment all at once. Time spent for reflection or review enables you to think critically in your peronal quiet moment... Keep learning and keep growing, if you don't grow mentally, you are only as good as a dead log.